Stuck in the Mud—A Lesson on Traction, Teamwork, and Progress
I want to start by sharing a quick story from my morning, which, interestingly enough, mirrors the challenges many of us face in promoting our mediation practices.
My husband and I spent the early hours digging his heavy truck out of the mud. He was preparing for a new job in Paris this week, and his truck was loaded with all the equipment he needed. But in Normandy, as you probably know, it rains—a lot. And this morning was no exception. His truck sank deep into the mud, and when hard he pressed the gas pedal, the front tires of that 2-ton truck just spun, kicking up wet muck but going nowhere.
Now, here’s the thing—my husband is amazing. Not only is he incredibly hardworking, but he’s also my partner in everything we do. We support each other through every challenge, and we always find a way to have fun, even in the messiest situations—like this morning. Whether we’re solving big life problems or just figuring out how to get a truck unstuck from the mud, we’re always a team.
What was the problem? truck had all the power and all the right equipment but no grip. The tires were spinning in place. So we needed friction, something to create a bit of traction. With a little elbow grease, we found dry, gritty dirt in the barn and laid down a few thick boards under the tires. It was a simple fix, but it worked like magic. The truck finally moved out of the mud, and we were on our way.
So what does this story have to do with marketing a mediation practice?
It wasn’t just the friction of dirt and wooden boards that helped; it was us working together. One of us spread the dirt and placed the boards, while the other got behind the wheel. It was teamwork that ultimately moved the truck forward.
The same is true for promoting your mediation practice. You can be fully equipped, but without the right support—whether that’s from another person, a consultant, or even technology—you might struggle to gain traction. You don’t have to do this alone. Sometimes, it takes teamwork and collaboration to get unstuck and move forward.
Feeling Stuck: A Common Struggle for Mediators
I get a lot of calls, conversations in consultations, and emails from mediators who feel exactly like that truck—stuck in the mud. They’re working hard, attending networking events, building websites, and sending out emails, but despite all this, they aren’t seeing the growth they expected. They tell me, "I’m putting in the effort, but I feel like I’m spinning my wheels."
Sound familiar?
You’re not alone. Many mediators find it challenging to develop their practice in a way that creates sustainable growth. Often, the problem isn’t that you’re not trying hard enough—it’s that your efforts aren’t focused in the right areas, or you’re lacking the "friction" that helps you gain traction. And more often than not, the missing ingredient is teamwork—partnering with the right people or tools to help get you where you need to go.
The Mud of Mediator Marketing: Common Pitfalls
Many of us find ourselves in a similar situation when it comes to promoting our practice. Here are a few common pitfalls that lead to "spinning your wheels":
Not knowing where to start – You have the skills but feel overwhelmed by the number of marketing options.
Lack of focus – Trying to be everywhere at once, whether it’s on every social media platform, networking with everyone, or offering every type of mediation service.
Relying on outdated or ineffective strategies – Maybe you've been using the same marketing tactics for years, but the landscape has shifted.
Without the right friction and, often, the right help, none of these efforts gain real traction. But with a few focused, simple tools—our dry dirt, wooden boards, and some teamwork—you can start seeing real movement.
Creating Friction: Three Key Areas for Marketing Traction
So, let’s talk about what "friction" looks like for mediators, and how you can use it to stop spinning your wheels. And importantly, how you can leverage teamwork—whether with another person or through technology—to make that friction even more effective.
Networking: Your Gritty Dirt
Just like that dry, gritty dirt gave the tires something to grab onto, targeted networking gives your practice something to grip. But networking doesn’t have to be done alone. Partnering with colleagues, mentors, or even consultants can open new doors and provide valuable introductions.
How to do it:
Start by identifying your niche or target market. Are you focusing on family mediation, workplace disputes, or something else?
Then, focus your networking efforts on those communities. This could mean attending industry-specific events, joining online forums, or even getting involved in local organizations that have connections to your niche.
For example, if you specialize in family mediation, consider speaking at local parenting or school events. Build relationships with divorce attorneys who might need your services for their clients.
Teamwork angle: Networking is amplified when you collaborate. Attend events with a colleague or mentor who can introduce you to the right people, or share leads with others to create a referral network.
Branding: Your Wooden Board
Branding is the solid board that gives your practice support. Without it, your message can get lost in the mud. It’s the foundation that defines who you are, what you offer, and why people should come to you. And like with networking, you don’t have to build your brand alone—bringing in experts, whether marketing consultants or graphic designers, can strengthen your efforts.
How to do it:
A strong, clear brand starts with knowing your value proposition. What makes your practice different from others? Is it your experience in high-stakes negotiations, your calm approach, or your ability to solve complex family dynamics? Define that clearly.
Make sure your online presence—your website, social media profiles, and any materials—reflects that value proposition. Ensure consistency across all platforms so people immediately recognize your practice.
Example: A mediator specializing in workplace conflicts could brand themselves as "the go-to resource for resolving high-tension workplace disputes without litigation."
Teamwork angle: Consider collaborating with a marketing consultant or a digital strategist to help define and execute your branding strategy.
Content: The Ongoing Traction
Just like the tires need continuous friction to keep moving, you need to consistently engage your audience to keep building momentum. This is where content comes in—whether it's articles, blog posts, videos, or podcasts. And again, technology can be your teammate here, making content creation and distribution easier and more effective.
How to do it:
Create content that speaks to your target audience’s needs and concerns. For example, if you focus on eldercare mediation, write articles about how families can navigate difficult conversations around elderly care.
Share real stories of how mediation has helped, with permission, to build trust and demonstrate your expertise.
And don’t be afraid to repurpose content—an article can become a video, a social media post, and even a short email newsletter.
Teamwork angle: Use technology tools like AI-driven content generators or scheduling platforms to automate some of your content creation and distribution, allowing you to reach more people efficiently.
Elbow Grease, Tenacity, and Teamwork: The Unsung Heroes
Now, let’s talk about the unsung heroes of that morning: elbow grease, tenacity, and teamwork.
While friction helped create traction, it didn’t happen without effort. We had to dig the truck out, spread the dirt, and strategically place the boards. And, we had to try more than once. The first few attempts didn’t work right away, but we didn’t give up.
Marketing your mediation practice is the same. You can have all the right tools—networking, branding, and content—but without consistent effort and the tenacity to keep trying, progress will be slow. The key is to apply that effort strategically, focusing on what works and doubling down on it.
And don’t forget, just like neither I nor my husband could dig the truck out alone, you don’t have to go through this process alone. Whether it’s a colleague, a consultant, or a tech tool, teamwork can make the difference between spinning your wheels and moving forward.
Which reminds me … Acknowledging My Teammates: The People the cups and the Pup Who Help Me Move Forward
Before I wrap up, I want to take a moment to thank the incredible teammates I have, who support me in different ways and help me keep moving forward.
First, I’d like to thank Jeff Kichaven and Jean Lawler, who work alongside me on the Will Work For Food project. Every week, we bring together presenters who generously share their stories and knowledge with the ADR community, all while encouraging donations to food banks. It's an inspiring project, and I'm so grateful for the people I work with and the people who work with me.
I also want to give a shout-out to Mr. Bischoff, who didn’t just look at my website but took the time to read it carefully. And, in doing so, he kindly pointed out a typo I hadn’t noticed. His attention to detail and generosity in letting me know is just another reminder of how we’re all part of a larger team, helping each other improve.
Of course, I can’t forget my cups of coffee, which have kept me fueled through countless hours of work, and my wonderful dog, who never fails to remind me to take a break, step away from my desk, and enjoy a walk in the rain and mud. She’s an essential part of my team, making sure I take time to recharge.
Getting Unstuck and Moving Forward with Teamwork
Just like we did with the truck this morning, sometimes it takes simple but smart steps to move forward. By laying down the right kind of friction—through focused networking, clear branding, and consistent content—and adding in the elbow grease of persistent effort, you’ll stop spinning your wheels and start gaining real traction in your practice.
And don’t forget the power of teamwork. Whether it’s collaborating with a colleague, hiring a consultant, or leveraging technology, you don’t have to do it alone. Just like my husband and I worked together to free the truck, having the right support can make all the difference in moving your practice forward.
Although we were muddy, sweaty, and breathing heavily by the time we finally got the truck unstuck, the sense of satisfaction when he pulled out onto the road was worth every bit of effort. That’s what you can expect when you combine the right tools, persistence, and teamwork in building your mediation practice—the rewarding sense of accomplishment when you finally gain the momentum you’ve been working toward.
